Our motorcycle trip last September ...

In order to refresh everyone's memory, and/or for the benefit of those who were not Facebook friends of mine last year, I've compiled the status updates describing our motorcycle trip last fall. Let's hope that this year's trip has even more adventure, and much less misadventure! Good times ... 

Lynn

September 1, 2013 near Criders Corners, PA

Day 1 of our motorcycle trip. We did not, as Dave intended, leave early. Why? Because he spent well over an hour looking for his rain pants. Which I found for him. Oh, and guess what he forgot to pack? MY rain pants. So, when the skies opened up near Erie, PA, I donned his!

Drivers were pulling off to the side of the road because of the rain. We just ploughed through it, and truth be told, it was fun. It's all part of the two-wheel adventure!

September 2, 2013 near Criders Corners, PA

Day 2 of our motorcycle trip dawns. I review the hotel bill that was slipped under our door, and gasp at the price of our dinner last evening. It almost equals the price of the room, which was not cheap to begin with!

And for a restaurant that prides itself on its signature ravioli offerings, including a chef-inspired "ravioli of the day" at "market pricing", should Dave have had to send it back because it was cold? No. I am, however, optimistic about this morning's buffet breakfast. Which is, no surprise, not "complimentary".

The adventure continues.

September 3, 2013 near Beckley, WV

Day 3 of our motorcycle trip dawns. I had hand-washed our high tech, "quick-dry" t-shirts the moment we checked into our freezing cold hotel room. After an uncomfortable night, I awaken and check the tees. They are still wet. I attempt to dry them with the hotel's blow dryer. This doesn't work, because the cord is too short for me to hang them anywhere while I use the dryer.

I decide to iron them dry, being careful to choose the Synthetic setting so as not to burn them. This fails. Now, instead of being wet, cold and clammy, they are wet and hot. We'll be packing them in a plastic bag, and wearing something else for today's ride. I haven't told Dave yet. Luckily, we're only about four hours (plus meandering) away from tonight's destination. Little Switzerland, here we come!

September 3, 2013 near Little Switzerland, NC

Day 3 of our motorcycle trip continues. It's chilly in the mountains! The lady in the suite next to us lends me her fleece and her scarf.

September 4, 2013 near Little Switzerland, NC

Day 4 of our motorcycle trip dawns. It is very peaceful and serene at the Switzerland Inn. Despite my mild(ish) hangover brought on by the three single malt Scotches consumed after our bottle of wine last evening, I awaken early.

I decide to sit quietly outside and enjoy the sunrise over the mountains, while Dave sleeps. I lock myself out. Luckily, Dave had left a window open. Not wanting to wake the neighbours, but needing to awaken my husband, I bark softly, pretending to be Lola McPoopie. Thank God this works!

September 4, 2013 near Little Switzerland, NC

Day 4 of the motorcycle trip continues. We tour the area, riding the Blue Ridge Parkway. When we return, Dave says he doesn't like the sound of the battery, which is not that old. He is worried that it will fail.

We have an appointment at the BMW dealership in Asheville tomorrow morning at 11:00. Hopefully the bike will start tomorrow morning and we can ride there. I'm also hoping that batteries are cheaper in the US than in Canada!

I wonder if we have to declare the battery as part of our duty-free purchases when we return. Hmmm.

September 5, 2013 near Little Switzerland, NC

Day 5 of our motorcycle trip. We get up early to ride to the BMW dealership in Asheville. I iron the blouse I want to wear to the Biltmore Estate. Dave packs all our "street clothes" and we head out. We arrive at the dealership and after dropping the bike off (we apparently also need a new rear tire as well as a new battery) I hit the change room. I have forgotten to give Dave the blouse I wanted to wear. We hit trendy Biltmore Village so I can buy a top. Otherwise, I'd be wearing white capris and a white tee-shirt. No. I find something suitable and purchase it.

September 5, 2013 near Little Switzerland, NC

Day 5 of our motorcycle trip continued ... We walk from Biltmore Village to the Biltmore Estate and head to the first gate. We are informed that you cannot walk in, you have to have a vehicle. What??? Doesn't ANYBODY walk anywhere in the US?

I inform the security guard that we are travelling on a motorcycle, which is at the dealership having a new battery installed, so we don't HAVE a vehicle. He tells us we can walk back to Group Sales, tell them our story, and they will send a shuttle to pick us up. Whatever. We do so.

Eventually, a shuttle bus comes to get us. It is a 2 mile drive to the Biltmore house. Who knew? Halfway there, I say to our driver, "We must have looked like IDIOTS walking up to the main gate." Being a polite Southerner, he did not reply.

September 6, 2013 near Knoxville, TN

Day 6 of our motorcycle trip is winding down: We shipped our purchases so far (and our dirty laundry) back to Canada just before checking out of the Switzerland Inn. Then, another trip to the Asheville BMW Motorcycle dealership -- Dave was convinced the new battery wasn't holding its charge. He was wrong. Nevertheless, he bought a portable battery charger. Whatever.

Then, off to Maggie Valley, where Dave crossed a number of items off his bucket list: Maggie Valley itself, a tour of the Wheels through Time motorcycle museum, and a ride through the Smokey Mountains to Tennessee.

We reserved a room in Gatlinburg and Pigeon Fork TN, "just in case". We ride through Gatlinburg, (not for us), into Pigeon Forge.

September 6, 2013 near Knoxville, TN

Day 6 of our motorcycle trip continued ... We skip Gatlinburg and head to Pigeon Forge. Apparently, there is a HUGE classic car show in town. I will let others describe this phenomenon:

"We won’t sugarcoat this…Pigeon Forge car shows bring lots of cars…therefore lots of traffic. Lots of traffic. Locals often refer to it as “gridlock” and visitors who roll into town not knowing a car show was going on end up leaving and saying they will never
be back. Simply put, make sure you know the dates of Pigeon Forge car shows!"

Exactly. Which is why we are, rather than in Gatlinburg or Pigeon Forge, in Knoxville tonight.

September 7, 2013 Relaxing after a lot of I-75 riding — at Doubletree by Hilton Lexington.

Day 7 of our motorcycle trip continues. The weather is perfect. I have run out of clean high tech "travel panties" and wear a regular pair for today's travels. Unlike the travel panties which are French cut, these are bikini. The delicate skin in the area where some women (not I) have a "tramp stamp", has direct contact with my mesh vented motorcycle pants. I feel the chafing the entire time we're on the highway.

I am now hand washing my travel panties in the hotel room sink. I hope they're dry by checkout time tomorrow.

September 8, 2014 near Lexington Manor, KY

Day 8 of the motorcycle trip begins. And it looks like Dave might have been right about there being a problem with the battery draining after all! He hooked it up at the Doubletree last night and gave it a full charge. This morning? It's almost dead.

The bike is now plugged in and charging right in front of the hotel's door. How are we going to make it back to Toronto from Lexington? The adventure continues.

September 8, 2013 near Lexington Manor, KY

Day 8 of our motorcycle trip and we are stalled. Luckily there is a BMW dealership on Lexington.

We check in once again. The bike is now completely dead. — at Doubletree by Hilton Lexington.

Note: Dave had mistakenly assumed that the Lexington BMW dealership had a motorcycle department. Further investigation revealed his error. The closest dealership is in Louisville, a mere hour and a half away on the I-64. We decide to make the best of it and enjoy the day.

September 8, 2013 near Lexington Manor, KY

Day 8 of the motorcycle trip is winding down. Stuck in Lexington, we take a cab downtown. All the stores are closed. We find a few open restaurants and eat at one.

We were told at the Welcome Centre that the circus was in town and where the animals were. Heading that way, we pass the Hyatt, which is insanely busy. I gather the Barnum & Bailey show was right next door.

I hit an uneven patch of sidewalk, and take a header, falling and scraping (shredding) my right palm, and my right arm from the palm to the elbow. Not one person comes to my aid. Other than Dave, no one asks me if I'm okay, or if I need help. No one.

Kentucky may pride itself on its friendliness and good manners, but when someone truly needs help? Not so much. The "adventure" continues, along with considerable bruising and raw patches.

September 9, 2013 near Lexington Manor, KY

Day 9 of our motorcycle trip begins. We are rushing to get ready so we can call the flatbed tow truck service to haul us to Louisville. I hope they can look at and repair our bike today. Positive thoughts for us, people. Please!

September 9, 2013 near Lexington Manor, KY

Day 9 of the motorcycle trip. We are still waiting to hear if we can even GET a frigging tow truck to take us to Louisville. The frustration mounts.

September 9, 2013 near Lexington Manor, KY

Day 9 of our motorcycle trip drags on. But there is some good news! Our tow truck will be here in about two hours. The dealership in Louisville is expecting us. There is just one teeny problem: two of their service techs are off today. Hmmm.

September 9, 2013 near Lexington Manor, KY

Day 9 of our motorcycle trip. The tow truck will be here in 10 minutes. YAY!!!!!

September 9, 2013 via iOS

The bike is finally on the tow truck, and we're about to begin our journey to Louisville.

 September 9, 2013 near Louisville, KY

Day 9 of the motorcycle trip drags on. We have now been sitting on the I-64, 20
miles from our destination for about an hour. There must be a horrific accident ahead.

September 9, 2013 near Louisville, KY

Day 9 of our motorcycle trip continues. This is what we were stuck in:
http://www.whas11.com/news/Police-serious-accident-on-I-64-near-mile-marker-38-222988621.html

We ended up turning around and driving the wrong way on the I-64 shoulder for about a mile. Then the alternate route into Louisville was of course backed up beyond belief, so we took some crazy back roads and eventually made our way back to I-64 past the accident.

Bike is being looked at, but no prognosis or diagnosis yet. The (mis)adventure continues!

September 9, 2013 near Louisville, KY

Day 9, AKA the final day of our motorcycle trip. And by final, I mean FINAL. It's at the dealership in Louisville KY, awaiting our decision as to what to do with the remains. Rest in peace, R1100RT. We had some good rides. Now, how the hell do we get back to Toronto? To be continued.

September 9, 2013 near Louisville, KY

Day 9 (AKA The Final Day) of our motorcycle trip is winding down. Tomorrow we pick up a rental car, drive to the Bowling Green area, pick up a friend's Canadian plated truck, drop off the rental car, drive back to the bike dealership, pick up our bike, and all our stuff, and drive home with the bike on the truck.

It's not exactly how I thought our road trip would end, but what the hell. Good friends are priceless! I'll bet Fatima can guess who this amazing friend is ... Stay tuned.
 

September 10, 2013 near Louisville, KY

Day 10 of the road trip formerly known as our motorcycle trip dawns. We will be calling Derek at Enterprise car rentals soon. The woman who checked us into the Courtyard last night was wonderful and very helpful. I feel like I was wrapped in a big hug.

Despite the bike dying in Lexington, my hurting myself on Lexington's uneven sidewalks and getting stuck in a two-fatality traffic jam on I-64 that brought us to a standstill until our tow truck driver turned and drove the wrong way before he could find a safe pass-through to the eastbound lanes, I still love Kentucky. Downtown Lexington? Not so much. Everywhere else? Yes. Yes.

September 10, 2013 near Bowling Green, KY

Day 10 of the road trip formerly known as our motorcycle trip continues. We have rented a car, driven to Bowling Green and picked up the truck. Next stop, back to Louisville to get the bike. Then the 900 kilometer trip back to Toronto begins. The truck? Doesn't have air conditioning.

September 10, 2013 near Louisville, KY

Day 10 of the road trip formerly known as our motorcycle trip continues. The bike is being strapped on to the truck. It is very noisy and hot in the cab since there is no air conditioning. It's going to be a long 900 kilometers home.

September 10, 2013 near Miamisburg, OH

Day 10 of the road trip formerly known as our motorcycle trip winds down. At least the travel part has. We wanted to make it to Columbus, OH, but every Marriott within a 50 mile radius is sold out. What's up with that? We have to backtrack and end up near Dayton, Ohio.

I am hot, sweaty, tired and starving. I'm sure I smell. Too darn bad for the server in the Courtyard's Bistro. At this point, I have very little pride left. Just get me some grub!

September 10, 2013 near Miamisburg, OH

Day 10 of the road trip formerly known as our motorcycle trip: can we still call it our motorcycle trip since the bike is with us, even if only on the back of a pickup truck?

Regardless, after a full day of travelling without A/C, I am used to the heat and humidity. In fact, I am so cold in our hotel room that the unit is off and the sliding door open.

September 11, 2013 near Miamisburg, OH

Day 11 of the road trip formerly known as our motorcycle trip continues. I am about to shower and look in my bag for fresh underwear. I only have one clean pair of panties left. They're black. Which would have been fine underneath my motorcycle pants, but will not work under my jean capris. Which are white. I am not doing that!

Having very little pride left, but enough not to wear black panties under white pants, I make an executive decision. I will wear my black running capris, which I never ran in once on this trip. Plus a light, semi dressy shirt, which is a tan, taupey colour. Fuck it.

September 11, 2013 near Miamisburg, OH

Day 11 of the road trip formerly known as our motorcycle trip begins. I am exhausted. I was, once again, wildly awake at 4:00am.

I pause to remember the victims of 9/11 on this anniversary. I also wonder if border security will be tighter due to the date. I just want to get home. More later.

September 11, 2013 near Fort Erie, ON

Day 11 of the road trip formerly known as our motorcycle trip continues.  We are in Canada!!!! WOO HOO!!!!!!

September 11, 2013 near London, ON

Day 11 of the road trip formerly known as our motorcycle trip continues. It's still sunny just west of London, but the radar shows a very nasty line of severe weather ahead. Of course it follows our route on the 401. That will just finish off this trip nicely.

September 11, 2013 near Toronto, ON

Day 11 of the road trip formerly known as our motorcycle trip winds down. In keeping with the highs and lows of this journey, we drove through London during a tornado warning (not a watch, a *warning*).

We were very lucky in that we were just behind the line of severe weather, so we didn't hit very much rain at all. I am pleased to announce that I am typing this update from inside my home. Woo hoo!

EPILOGUE

September 16, 2013 near Toronto, ON

Day 16, the final day of our vacation and the road trip formerly known as "our motorcycle trip" nears an end. Since September 1st I have driven, driven in, or ridden on no fewer than 8 different modes of transportation. After returning home to Toronto this week, we drive to Collingwood, where we host Dave's family at our vacation property for the weekend.

Our duties are now over. Upon arriving home for good, we are eager to eat a hasty meal, kick back and enjoy a glass of wine. Dave fires up the barbeque in the rain. Lola McPoopie joins him outside. Within a minute, I hear Dave yelling, "GET OUT OF THERE! GET BACK! GET BACK!!!". I look out the window to see him dragging Lola by the collar back to the house. Why? Because there is a dead raccoon in our back yard, face down in the river rock next to the bay window.

I can't think of a more perfect ending to this vacation.

The Citiots go for a ride and get lost in the woods

Two Sundays ago Dave and I were up in Collingwood, enjoying another relaxing weekend. We decided to go for a motorcycle ride. We haven't done as much riding as in other years, and we both miss it.

One of the main reasons we bought the condo - or so we told ourselves in the winter - was so that we could bring one of our two BMW R1100RT touring bikes and leave it in the garage. That way we could enjoy country rides without having to spend at least an hour getting out of Toronto before seeing trees instead of other motorists. What a nifty time saver!

We brought "Victor" up north. Victor is the higher mileage, black bike, named after Victor (the Dark Knight) Newman from The Young & the Restless. Victor was originally bought to live out west. We had this idea that we would fly to BC every year and enjoy the great scenery and twisty roads without the hassle of trying to rent a BMW motorcycle - the west coast is definitely Harley country. Well, that didn't work out, so two years after riding Victor all the way to BC, we flew to Vancouver and rode him home. Victor has once again found his special purpose, with a new life up north.

Normally I am decked out in German riding gear, from my BMW Commuter pants, to my BMW Three-Phase jacket, and a Schuberth C2 helmet. In colder weather, and when my weight is up (like it is NOW) I might wear my black BMW Maverick jeans, and if it's hot and humid, and my weight is down, (so ... not this summer) I'll wear my tan coloured BMW Summer pants: they turn into shorts with the flick of a zipper. I go Canadian for my extremities, with Joe Rocket vented gloves and Cruiserworks waterproof boots (my pair was made in Canada, before Cruiserworks outsourced to South America). Everything coordinates nicely!

I brought my old "shortie" HJC helmet and Joe Rocket jacket to leave in Collingwood. I cart my gloves and boots back and forth from the city to the condo for now. I've yet to find a suitable second pair of gloves and God knows I've tried, and I'm reluctant to order boots online. I suppose I could bring a pair of old cowboy boots and leave them there, but there are limits to how much I'll compromise regarding my biking attire.

So, dressed in my B-list gear, which includes an overly tight pair of Eddie Bauer jeans (that nagging weight issue again), we set off to explore the Niagara Escarpment.

Dave had a destination in mind, namely Flesherton. There was no particular draw to the town, other than to get there. We didn't even stop; we enjoyed the ride there, cruised the main drag, and 20 seconds later, having toured the town, we turned around, mission accomplished.

On the way back, Dave noticed on his map that we were close to the Feversham Gorge. Having had a very successful tour of the beautiful Eugenia Falls gorge a few weeks earlier, we decided to check it out.

We could tell right away that this gorge wouldn't be as picturesque as Eugenia Falls. You rode under a canopy of trees to get to the Eugenia Falls parking lot; this parking lot was out in the open, right off County Road 2. We had the Eugenia Falls parking lot to ourselves; we shared the Feversham Gorge parking lot with three yellow school buses.

My first thought was, "Oh, great. We'll be surrounded by swarms of obnoxious, loud children. I came up here to avoid crowds!", but other than ourselves there were only four adults picnicking next to the outhouses. Turns out they were the drivers of the school buses. I guess they were having a midsummer reunion.

Though it was a hot, sticky day, and I was fully clothed, including my motorcycle jacket, it was reasonably cool on the pathway. The paths weren't as scenic as the Eugenia Falls ones, and you could hear highway noise. We hiked onward, despite the disappointing surroundings; I was eager to clock more steps on my pedometer. Eventually we saw the waterfall; that is, if you craned your neck to the left, you could see a small trickle of water pouring down a cliff. Yawn! A few feet past the waterfall, craning your neck to the right revealed a bridge. Aha, so that was the source of the traffic noise!

"If we keep going, we might come out at the other end of the parking lot. Or, we'll end up on the road, and we can walk back to the bike on the gravel shoulder", suggested Dave.

"I don't feel like walking next to cars and trucks and hot pavement in my jeans and jacket", I barked back. Clearly, I'd had enough of the hike.

"Let's just turn around and go back the way we came, then", said Dave.

On our way back, I noticed there were actually two paths, one a little too close to the edge of the cliff for my comfort level.

"Let's take the high road!", I called out, my enthusiasm for the hike renewed, now that I knew it was almost over. The high road would get us to the parking lot that much quicker. We took the high road. And walked. And kept walking. And kept walking. I looked at my watch, and deduced that we had definitely walked for a lot longer on the way back than the way to the falls.

"Umm, see that fencing?", I asked Dave.

"Oh, good. So you don't remember seeing it on the way in, either, do you?", came his reply. Not exactly what I wanted to hear. How the hell could we be lost? This was a nothing gorge! The forest fell silent. The trees grew taller. The traffic noise died away.

"We don't have any water or cell phones with us", I pointed out.

"Well, we're not exactly lost", came Dave's sarcastic reply. "Let's just turn around. We must have missed the exit."

I had visions of overshooting the exit again, getting caught in an endless loop of bland scenery and annoying traffic noise. My right foot started getting sore. My throat felt parched. I briefly considered yelling for help, but figured the traffic noise would drown out my cries, and the bus drivers wouldn't hear me.

My limp became more pronounced as we retraced our steps. I cursed myself for not putting my orthotics into my motorcycle boots when we left the condo. I scanned the path, looking for clues as to our whereabouts. I started remembering that awful movie, "The Blair Witch Project". Now I understood why my friend Scott thought the movie was scary, whereas I had found it laughable. I had to pee.

Minutes later, we came to the fork in the path that led to the parking lot. We passed the picnickers, and Dave used the outhouse. I took one look and sniff inside the Ladies' toilet, and opted to wait for a Tim Horton's. We said nothing to the bus driving picnickers, took some pictures near the Gorge's sign, and rode off.